Reality Sets in – no Quitting My Day Job

Well, once again the cold, harsh reality that blogging will probably never be anything more than just a little hobby I do for myself is starting to set it. For the last 8 years or so, I have started blog after blog, excited about the possibility of it becoming even a little popular, only to realize that’s not going to happen. And to be certain, I don’t mean this entirely in a self-pity, poor me way (though honestly I do feel that way sometimes – bleh heh! Lol). I know that I don’t do as much as a person really needs to do to promote it. I mean, I have been posting links on Facebook a lot, but sadly enough, almost no one – not even my family! Lol – actually click on them to check it out.

Of course there’s a lot of stuff going against this site ever being popular too. For one, the name is probably very misleading to a lot of people. If older, they might think “I don’t want to see some silly memes.” They might also be turned off by the magick part of it. Those seeking awesome occult information in the vein of Aleister Crowley who come here might be disappointed to find out it isn’t all about that. There is some of that, but there’s a lot of other stuff too. And people who are into science probably think the site title points to the fact that this site is run by some silly magic-believing New Age weirdo who doesn’t know the first thing about science. So in retrospect, I probably should have chosen something a little different. But I think it has a ring to it, and according to the definitions I posted on one of my earliest posts, the title IS accurate:

Magick:  the Science and Art of causing Change to occur in conformity with Will 

Meme:  an element of a culture or system of behavior that may be considered to be passed from one individual to another by nongenetic means, especially imitation.

“Blogging with a conscious intent to bring about a change in people’s thinking and behavior – that’s Magickmeme.”

I thought it was clever, and might draw people in. And honestly, there aren’t a lot of affordable, decent domain names left these days. It was cheap!

And I’m sure there are hundreds, if not thousands of other people out there blogging, hoping to get “discovered” and gain enough followers to really do something. And I’m sure many of those are much better than mine. But of course there are the Kardashians, the guy who got famous for pouring champagne on half or fully naked women, and a gaggle of other people who got rich and famous posting things that weren’t necessarily Peabody material either lol.

I have put more into it this time than ever before. I did purchase a custom domain, as questionable as the name might be lol. I have been trying to post almost every day. I have been adding images to make the posts more visually appealing. I have been posting links and trying to promote them on Facebook. I’m not really sure what else to do at this point – other than keep writing, and say “screw it.”

I am fortunate enough to have a career that allows me to have a nice life, so it’s not like I NEED this blog to become some cash cow. I am not interested in “selling out,” or putting a bunch of advertising up to bring in income. And I want to enjoy writing – not do it because I feel I need to. You know, I think I may have posted a post like this already, and if so, this is repetitive. But so be it – I must need to hear it again.

I’m going to stop trying so hard and just write again. I’m not going to post on Facebook anymore, only to have not one person come over from there. I’m not going to post as if others are reading this, not going to add images to make it more visually appealing – except when I want to. And most importantly, I am going to commit to my innermost self not to get caught up in false hope again. Perhaps someday, I will have the time and resources to write the book I want to write, and maybe I will even be able to self publish or something. But for now, it’s back to journaling here and recording things I want to remember and to be able to access across different devices.

To those who have made it in the blogging world, I say kudos to you and congrats, because I’m sure it takes a lot of work – work that I honestly am not willing or able to put in at this time. A very wise sage once said (pretty sure I’ve already posted this too lol) : “You gotta’ know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em.” I’m out on this hand! Lol

PS – and I’m turning off “like” and “comment” notifications too. They have become like an addiction, and I feel icky when I post and don’t get any at all. Don’t need that in my life, so yeahhh… Notifications = off.

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